The One With The Umbrella: Part 2

DISCLAIMER:

These stories are inspired by Felicia’s colorful 2017. If the reader prefers, the short stories/blogs or parts of it may be regarded as fiction. But as Ernest Hemingway said, there is always the chance that fiction may throw some light on what has been regarded as fact.

The One With The Umbrella: Part 2

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I’m hoping you have read some of past blogs already. Otherwise, you may be lost in this one. For a little background, I suggest to read blog entry, "The One When I Spent My First Weekend in Hartford." 

... One week ago, my heart was broken.(See Archive, "The One When I Found Out") A few hours earlier today, I received another news that crushed me. I was laid off from my job of 10 years. (See Archive,"The One With The Umbrella-Part 1)But now, John is coming! Everything will be alright.

Still that Monday in May 2017…

It’s already 5:00pm and  I was again on the phone with John's daughter, Nadine. She said she called her friend and her mom, Emma, who were both working at a university close to her house. She asked them  if there could be  a job for me there. How sweet is that! Our 15-minute conversation ended with, “ My dad’s here. I think he’s picking me up and we’re coming to see you.”

I started to get ready.

Nothing too vain, just a jacket over my plain Tinkerbell T-shirt , faded jeans  and a dab of Blistex medicated lip balm, something John always gives me. I remember him saying “You have beautiful ‘black woman’ lips. You have to take care of them and just keep them moist.” I also put on some rose pink blush.  After all, I’ve been crying all day, and I already lost weight from losing sleep a full week after that “Mother’s Day Surprise”(See Archive, "The One When I Found Out"). I wanted to look half decent when he sees me. He has not seen me since February, when I took him and our children on a ski trip in Vermont. Although we Facetimed once a week, the last time I picked up a video call from him was April. I’m not sure if that was giving him the “silent treatment” or I was just fed up with this not so long distance relationship, which was never really an issue until the past year.

It’s 7:30pm. John and Nadine are not here yet. I checked my 'Find Friends' app and saw Nadine’s location. Yes, we share locations! That’s how close we are. She was still in her city, at a mall, so I assumed John is coming alone. Another hour later, I got a text from John. He said he has a meeting tomorrow morning, but will try to leave work early so he can drive up to Boston.  I was disappointed, but as usual, I believed him.  A text message like this is not really  new to me. But then again, this is a day I really needed his shoulder to cry on.

It’s Tuesday and rain is pouring. Somehow, I am preparing myself for a text message with another excuse, something I have been doing for more than a year now. Though always hopeful, I almost never expect anything anymore. I figured it will hurt less that way.  

But then at around 3:00pm, I got a “ETA 4:30pm” text message.  My heart skipped a beat! Not only is he coming in the pouring rain, but he also actually left work early... for me!

As I wait, I sent a text message to my son, Bryan. I wanted to give him a heads up that John is coming. Bryan was very upset. He kept telling me to tell John to turn around and go back to Hartford. I told him that John is only coming to look at my HR paperwork and help me do the unemployment application. Bryan did not care. He knows I can do stuff like that by myself. He even said, “If you are too distraught to do it, let me do it for you. Just send him back where he came from!” (Note: Remember that the only thing that Bryan and I know at this time is that John has a "new" girlfriend, and that we are sort of “on a break” for about 3 months now.)

John was about an hour late, but it didn’t matter. He still came. His brand new “Misty Harbor”  blue umbrella was drenched. 

We only talked about my job, I mean my past job. He completed the online application for me. We did not talk about anything else. We did not even hug. It was very awkward. I did not ask him about his “new” girlfriend. I figured this “fling,” whoever it was, did not deserve any credit.

Just before John left, I gave him a letter and a black box (Spoiler Alert: Future Blog). This was for his birthday, which is about 3 weeks away. I told him that I will not be able to give him his usual birthday present anymore, but this one is really special. He did not want to take it, but I insisted. I can see and feel the guilt in his eyes and in his tone.

Just a few minutes after he left, he sent me 2 text messages. The first was “ You must know I really wanted to give you a hug,” and the next, “ I left my (new Misty Harbor)umbrella!” I only responded to the umbrella text message. I did not know how to respond to the first.

A few days later, Nadine called to check on me. She told me, that Monday night she thought her dad was picking her up so they can come see me, John only came to drop off something. John told Nadine he had to go to Cape Cod for a meeting.  

Another Fast Forward to November 2017…  

• While “trapped” in Lili’s office for 2 hours (See Blogs, "The One When I Was Plan B" and "The One With The Black Panther), Lili told me John was with her in  Misty Harbor in Cape Cod  in May 2017. I did not even tell Lili about the umbrella, but it is clear where John was the night I lost my job, the night I was waiting for him, the night I needed him, even just as a friend. 

In a past blog, “The One Where I Bought a Piano,” I wrote that I have thrown away many things that reminded me of John. I still have the umbrella. No one is using it, but I kept it to remind me of the kind of man...person John really is each time my heart bleeds for him when my left brain overanalyzes why he is the way he is. 

Oh, my son Bryan did not talk to me that Tuesday night. I felt so guilty, especially after he actually left his work 3 hours early yesterday just so he could give his mom a hug. Now, that is a man who loves me!

To be continued…

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  Now, to my readers… As heartbreaking as these may all sound, remember that my blog’s title is Bye Felicia, Hello Life. The “Hello Life” parts will be blogged about,  (some are already in “The One With The Summer Surprises.”)  But as writer Octavia Butler said, “ You don't start out writing good stuff. You start out writing crap… thinking it's good stuff, and then gradually, you get better at it.”
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